I am generally speaking of this belief that the wedding just isn’t constantly in regards to you, however it should mirror you: your opinions, your values, as well as your community. One of many feedback because that was one of our goals in planning the event that we heard most often about our wedding was: “It was so… you,” and I loved it. I do believe this is exactly why We struggled a great deal with my feelings concerning the Nigerian engagement ceremony that individuals had the before our wedding week. The entire occasion ended up being simply therefore perhaps maybe perhaps not me personally, generally not very.

This really is me prior to the ceremony: unsure regarding how I appear and feel (and my capability to walk in those heels). Picture by Genevieve Burruss. Please realize, whenever it is said by me was not “me,” I do not suggest because i am perhaps maybe not Nigerian (although i am perhaps perhaps perhaps not). After all that the aesthetic had been over-the-top and vibrant while We tend towards minimalist and quirky. I am talking about that there were duplicated sources to beliefs that are religious social values that i actually do not share. After all that the (American) food had mushrooms I don’t like) and the accent color was pink (again, not a fan) in it(which. I happened to be in heels rather than flats with earrings that hurt my ears, and now we nearly totally missed dinner for the costume modification. I invested a lot of the evening feeling such as for instance a life-size doll.

Permit me to explain with a listing of a Nigerian engagement ceremony…

(Disclaimer: it is my understanding after nine months of planning, and something day of coping with it, not quite as some body raised within the tradition. It had been a Christian, Yoruba ceremony.)

A Nigerian engagement ceremony is normally hosted by the spouse’s family and does occur soon prior to the wedding. It really is sometimes also called the “Traditional Wedding.” (for the ceremony, my in-laws planned and hosted it plus it had been the before our wedding.